72 virgins

This is clever and hilarious: 72 Virgins by Steve Martin. My favorites:

Virgin No. 7: Here, I’ll just pull down your zipper. Oh, sorry!

Virgin No. 9: It was a garlic-and-onion pizza. Why?

Virgin No. 10: . . . so I see Heath, and he goes, “Like, what are you doing here?,” and I go, “I’m hangin’ out,” so he goes, “Like, what?” . . . 

Virgin No. 14: I’m eighty-four. So what?

Virgin No. 16: Even I know that’s tiny.

Virgin No. 17: “Do it”? Meaning what?

Virgin No. 30: You are in?

Virgin No. 38: I’m Zania, from the planet Xeron. My vagina is on my foot.

Virgin No. 39: It’s a lesion, and, no, I don’t know what kind.

Virgin No. 45: When you’re done, you should really check out how cool this ceiling is.

Virgin No. 56: I think I found it. Is that it? Oh. Is this it? Oh, this must be it. No?

Virgin No. 58: Those are my testicles.